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The Best 80's Jokes

The 1980s was a fun and vibrant decade filled with memorable pop culture and iconic references. It was a time when video games like Atari and classic arcade games kept us entertained for hours. The era also brought us memorable toys and trading cards such as Cabbage Patch Kids and Garbage Pail Kids. The fashion was colorful and bold, and the music was full of catchy tunes that still make us want to dance. The 80s truly had its own unique and unforgettable charm!


Get ready to hop into a time machine and journey back to the totally tubular 1980s! In addition to the rad fashion, groovy tunes, and iconic pop culture references, we've got a hilarious collection of 80s jokes that'll have you laughing like it's the decade of big hair and neon leggings all over again. So grab your joystick, pop in a cassette tape, and get ready to giggle your way through these gnarly jokes that'll take you right back to the era of cassette tapes and Rubik's Cubes! Let's get this bodacious comedy party started!


How long did Lionel Richie sit on the toilet


Lionel Richie with toilet roll

Punchline: all night long


Why are valley girls so odd?


valley girls

Because they can't even.


If 80s movies have taught me anything.


80s guys with sweaters around neck

It is that everyone with a sweater tied around their neck is a prick.


What is the difference between Michael Jackson and Richard Pryor?


mj and richerd pryor

Punchline: Michael Jackson was burned using Pepsi, and Richard Pryor was burned using Coke


How many letters are in the alphabet?


E.T headshot

Punchline: 22, because E.T. went home and somebody shot J.R.


How does Michael Jackson prepare his morning egg.


MJ eating

Beats it.


How do you know you grow up in the 80s?


retro TV set

Punchline: Because you still get up to turn the TV off.


What is the King's favourite song by Prince?


king charles

Purple Reign.


Why is it a good idea to have a DeLorean as a back up car?


Delorean

You can drive it from time to time.


What do you get when you cross an '80s hair band with a fish?


Bon Jovi 80s photo

BonChovy.


What would happen if Whoopi Goldberg married Scooby-Doo?


Scooby and whoopi

Punchline: Whoppi Doo!


What is Indiana Jones favourite band?


Indiana Jones running from rock

The Rolling Stones.


What's Madonna's favorite sauce?


madonna eating

Hollandaise. Celebrate!


What did Darth Vader say when the record store employee told him they were out of George Michael albums?


George michael Faith Album cover

"I find your lack of 'Faith' disturbing."


What do Abraham Lincoln and an ’80s sitcom have in common?


80s TV studio audience

Punchline: Both were shot before a live audience.


What did Arnold Schwarzenegger say when he was invited to a costume party with a classical music theme?


Arnie Terminator pic

"I'll be Bach."


Who is Mr T's favourite character in Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles?


April from Ninja Turtles

April, fools!


They say an 80s theme TV show couldn’t work on a modern internet streaming platform


Stranger things logo

Punchline: But Stranger Things has happened.


I purchased a Bonnie Tyler GPS but I had to take it back for a refund.


Bonnie Tyler 80s

It kept telling me to turn around, and every now and then it falls apart!


Why do the '80s kids always place the manger scene in the middle of the room?


Swayze Dirty Dancing

Because nobody puts baby in a corner.


Can you believe that guy thinks he's a better Tetris player than me?


Tetris game screenshot

He's wrong on so many levels!


Why couldn't the Ghostbusters ever finish Oregon Trail?


Oregon Trail game

They refused to cross the streams.


Why did people in the 80s have big hair?


80s big hair female

Punchline: To look taller on their fake ID.


Why were some people living in the 80s so clean and healthy?


Kylie Minogue wearing high jeans in 80s

Punchline: Because they had good high jeans


An 80s singer caught on fire; what does he do?


Rick Astley

Punchline: Stop, Drop, and Rick-Roll


What do you call a large spider that likes New Romantic 80s bands?


Duran Duran 80s

Punchline: A Durantula.


How does David Byrne from Talking Heads look these days?


Talking Heads

He's the same as he ever was, same as he ever was!


Which DVD won't Rick Astley let you borrow from his Pixar collection?


Disney UP cover

He's never gonna give you Up.


Why did Bono fall off the stage at the U2 concert?


Bono and The Edge

He was too close to The Edge.


Why did the 80's printer keep flashing the error message that it just can't get enough?


Depeceh Mode 80s

It was stuck in Depeche Mode.


What did the '80s girl say when someone asked for her phone number?


Jenny 8675309

8675309.


I have a condition where I can't stop singing songs by The Knack.


the Knack band

The doctors say I have the MySharona virus.


What did the patient say when the doctor told him, "Your brain seems to have deleted all information about '80s music"?


Robert Smith from The Cure 80s

"Oh no. What is The Cure?"


The band at my wedding kept playing song by Flock Of Seagulls


Flock Of Seagulls

So I ran, I ran so far away.


How come the members of U2 still haven't found what they're looking for?


U2 Streets have no name

Because the streets have no names.



Hopefully you enjoyed our 80s jokes collection. If you do love the 80's and perhaps even the 90's too. Make sure to check out our radical 80's 90's retro radio station above. A super fun blast down memory lane with music, TV Themes, movie quotes and more!



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