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Yo Mama Jokes for 2024

(scroll down for yo mama jokes or pick another category instead)

Before we get into the funniest insults ever...

What are Yo Mama Jokes?

As defined by Urban Dictionary, "Yo Mama Jokes" are the most (least) sophisticated jokes on this planet. They are designed to insult one's mother for the entertainment of a group. These jokes often promote fights and other violence and usually begin with one of the following phrases:
Yo mama so fat...
Yo mama so ugly...
Yo mama so sexy...
Yo mama so dumb...
Yo mama so old.... etc etc

 

Why tell an Yo Mama Joke?

They offend someone and hopefully the joke makes them laugh a little too through the absurdity of them. Yo Mama Jokes are silly roasts that friends often share between each other, often when playing a game or a sport like basketball.

Who should you tell an Insult Joke to?

Yo Mama jokes are funny insults for friends! Be very careful who you tell a Yo Mama joke to or you may end up really offending someone or even worse, the joke may result in you receiving a black eye from the recipient! We recommend telling them to friends who have a good sense of humour.

Now, into the Yo Mama Jokes...

A Fat Mama

Your Mama So Fat Jokes

 

 

 

Your mama so fat, she wears a sock on each toe.

 

 

 

Your mama so fat that when she gets on the scales they said "I need your weight not your phone number"

Your mama so fat, she has to use google earth to take a selfie.

 

 

 

Your mama so fat, she has more folds than an oragami crane.

Your mama so fat that when she wears her yellow raincoat on the street, people yell out "taxi"

Your mama so fat, the photo you took of her last christmas is still printing.

 

 

 

Your mama so fat that when she want to iron her dress, she has to go out to her driveway.

Your mama so fat that when she gets dressed, she has to use a boomerang to put on her belt

Your mama so fat that her favourite necklace is the food chain.

Your mama so fat that when she lays down on memory foam, it immediately forgets everything.

Your mama so fat that when she fell over, nobody was laughing but the ground sure was cracking up.

Your mama so fat that when she steps on the scales it says "to be continued".

Your mama so fat that she don't need the internet, she is already worldwide.

Your mama so fat that when she went sunbathing at the beach, greenpeace came along and pushed her back into the ocean.

Youre mama so fat that her butt has it's own zip code.

Your mama so fat that when she goes out to check her mail, it measures 9 on the Richter scale.

Youre mama so fat that the police took her in for for carrying 100 kilos of crack.

Your mama so fat not even Dora was able to explore her.

Your mama so fat, when she eats food her fitbit thinks that she is exercising.

Your mama so fat, her belly button has an echo.

Your mama so fat, her blood type is Nutella.

Your Mama So Ugly Jokes

Your mama so ugly, she scared the crap out of the toilet.

 

Your mama so ugly that she tried to enter an ugly contest and the judges said, "sorry, no professionals".

Your mama so ugly that when she was born they had to put tints on her incubator.

Yo mama so ugly that when she looks in the mirror, her reflection ducks.

 

 

 

 

Your mama so ugly that she makes blind people cry when she walks past them.

Your mama so ugly that when she walks into a bank they have to turn off the security cameras so they don't break.

Your mama so ugly that when she looks at the mirror, your reflection throws up.

Your mama so ugly that when she went to the haunted house, she came out with a job application.

​​​Your mama so ugly, that even Hello Kitty said goodbye.

Your mama so ugly that I'm going to have to stop drinking just in case I start seeing two of her.

Your mama so ugly, she looks like someone tried to put out a face fire with a bike chain.

Your mama so ugly she made One Direction go the other way.

 

 

 

Your mama so ugly that her portraits hang themselves.

Your mama so ugly that instead of seeing a doctor when she gets sick, she has to go to a vet.

Your mama so ugly that when she stuck her head outside your car window, she was arrested by the police for mooning.

Your mama so ugly that when she sits down on sand all the nearby cats come and try to bury her.

Your mama so ugly that when she went swimming the tide wouldn't bring her back to shore.

Your mama so ugly that when you she was born her mother asked "how does my little treasure look", and the doctor replied, I think we should bury it immediately.

Your mama so ugly that people don't mind when she parks her car in the handicapped spot.

Your mama so ugly that even the police sketcher was too scared to draw her.

Your mama so ugly that as soon as her mother went into labor, all of the hospital staff went on strike.

Your mama so ugly that Freddy Krueger has nightmares about her face.

Your mama so ugly that she make onions cry.

Your mama so ugly that she made Kanye West go East just so that he didn't need to see her face.

Your mama so ugly that she looks like something I drew with my left hand.

Your mama so ugly that when she watches TV the channels change by themselves.

Your mama so ugly that when she entered her dog in an ugly dog contest, they gave her a ribbon and a scratch behind the ear.

Your mama so ugly that she didn't need to wear a costume when she auditioned for Star Wars.

 

Your Mama So Stupid Jokes

Your mama so stupid that when she heard it was chilly outside, she ran and got a bowl and spoon.

Your mama so stupid that she won't play candy crush because she has diabetes.

 

 

 

Your mama so stupid she tried to put her M & M's in alphabetical order.

 

 

Your mama so stupid that she got locked in a supermarket and starved.

Your mama so stupid that she thought a quarterback was a refund.

Your mama so stupid that she climbed a glass wall to see what was on the other side.

Your mama so stupid she didn't even pass her birth certificate.

Your mama so stupid that if we were invaded by zombies, she would be completely safe because zombies eat brains.

Your mama so stupid that when she was driving to Disneyland, she saw a sign that said "Disneyland Left" so she turned around and drove home.

Your mama so stupid that when someone stole her TV she quickly ran outside and yelled out "hey! you forgot the remote control!"

Your mama so stupid that not even google can translate her.

What is 1+1?

Your mamas I.Q.

 

Yo mama so stupid, she thinks that the Harlem shake is a drink.

 

 

 

Yo mama so stupid, when the doctor told her she had the coronavirus she went out and bought a new laptop.

 

 

 

Yo mama so stupid, she thought Spotify was a stain remover.

 

 

 

Your Mama So Hairy Jokes

 

 

 

Your mama so hairy that if she shaved her legs, she could supply wigs for the entire Hairclub For Men.

 

 

 

Your so hairy that when she comes out of the shower it is like Gorillas In The Mist.

Your mama so hairy that when she went hiking in the mountains, another sighting of Bigfoot was immediately reported.

 

 

Your mama so hairy that when she takes her dog out for a walk, she always get pet by strangers before the dog does.

Your mama so hairy that when she went to the zoo they locked her in the gorilla cage.

Your mama so hairy that she needs a chainsaw to shave her legs.

Your mama so hairy that people mistake her for an ewok.

 

 

 

Your mama so hairy that when she visited the zoo, she got locked up.

 

 

 

Your mama so hairy that when she went skydiving, everyone thought she was a flying magic carpet.

Your mama so hairy that when she shaved her body, she lost 30kg.

Your mama so hairy that last year a couple of birds made nests in her armpits and she still don't know about them.

Your mama so hairy that when she went to the beach everyone told her she could take off her fur coat.

Your Mama So Old Jokes

 

Your mama so old that she owes Jesus Christ a quarter.

 

 

 

Your mama so old that her tax file number is 1.

Your mama so old that she voted for god.

 

Your mama is so old she has an autographed copy of the bible.

 

 

 

Your mama so old that when she passes away, there will be a worldwide race between paleontologists to dig her up.

Your mama so old that if someone told her to act your age, she would drop dead.

Your mama so old that there is a photo of Jesus in her yearbook.

Your mama so old that she used to ride a dinosaur to school.

Your mama so old she knew Gandalf before he had a beard.

 

 

 

Your mama so old that she farts dust and pees rust.

Your mama so old, she was a crossing guard when Moses parted the sea..

Your mama so old that she is still impressed when she sees colour television.

Your mama so old that when she had science class the only elements on the periodic table were earth, wind, water and fire.

Your mama so old that the big bang nearly made her go deaf.

Your mama so old that she preordered the bible.

Your mama so old that she remembers when Burger King was still a burger prince.

Your mama so old that she used to get her fruit and vegetables from the Garden of Eden.

Your mama so old that when she visited the museum, they offered her a full time position as a living exihibit.

Your mama so old that she sends her text messages in morse code.

Your Mama So Poor Jokes

 

Your mama so poor that she can't even afford to pay attention.

Your mama so poor, she went to McDonalds and put a cheeseburger on laybuy.

 

 

 

Your mama so poor she gave you all a fork to eat your cereal to save milk.

 

 

 

Your mama so poor, her face is on the front of foodstamps.

 

Your mama so poor that I saw kicking a can down the street the other day and asked her what she was doing, she replied "moving".

Your mama so poor that when she goes to the park, the ducks throw bread at her.

Your mama so poor that she goes to the rubbish dump with her grocery list.

Your mama so poor that Nigerian princes send her money.

Your mama so poor that people lose weight when they pick up her wallet.

Your mama so poor that she goes to the changing rooms in a department store and ask for spare change.

Your mama so poor that when someone stepped on a lit match in her house she yelled out "who turned off my heating?"

Your mama so poor that she goes to KFC to lick other peoples fingers.

Your mama so poor that for Christmas she cut a hole in your pants so you would have something to play with on Christmas day.

Your mama so poor that on hot summer days she waves a popsicle around in the air to air condition your house.

Your mama so poor that she has multiple email accounts, just so that she is able to eat the spam.

Your mama so poor that when she was walking down the road with one shoe on and somebody asked her "did you lose a shoe?" she replied "no I found one".

Your mama so poor that instead of buying a bidet, she just does handstands in your shower.

Now we just couldn't leave this scene from White Men Can't Jump that has some of the greatest Yo Mama jokes of all time.

Whether you visited this page for a good laugh or for some epic comebacks, these classic yo mama jokes are bound to leave you in stitches. Share them with your friends for a guaranteed giggle-fest and remember, laughter is the best medicine for any situation! Keep the fun going and spread the joy of these timeless quips far and wide!

 

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